Bigs
OOA pledge
Posts: 236
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Post by Bigs on May 15, 2009 11:31:29 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
Mine had an even better public relations firm.... or maybe I didn't care cause I was doing my own thing..... |
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Bigs
OOA pledge
Posts: 236
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Post by Bigs on May 15, 2009 11:31:44 GMT -5
And my comment.... "No comment"
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Post by Cambist on May 15, 2009 11:31:56 GMT -5
I was young, AFRAID yet felt a strong (yet unspoken) bit of obligation.
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Post by Bunny Hop on May 15, 2009 11:32:59 GMT -5
I agree 100%. Also, I believe that the under-30 crowd still has unrealistic views of marriage--that it's a non-stop fun fairytale; non-stop sex, hand-holding, Valentine's Day gifts, kissing, going out, etc. Just seems like a generalization to me.... Very much so because I'm 26 and I certainly don't think like that. I don't even think of serious relationships as all that mushy stuff that Z listed. Those things are certainly part of it but there is still plenty of work put into making it work. |
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Post by No Screen Name on May 15, 2009 11:37:18 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
Damie--(and everybody)--how do you feel about the prospect of remaining perpetually single? How does this make you feel? Frightened? Excited? Happy? Sad? Content? Would you be willing? Would you feel you were missing out? |
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Post by Blu on May 15, 2009 11:38:42 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
Damie--(and everybody)--how do you feel about the prospect of remaining perpetually single? How does this make you feel? Frightened? Excited? Happy? Sad? Would you be willing? Would you feel you were missing out? Before I met my wife, I would have been very content with the idea. |
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Post by Bunny Hop on May 15, 2009 11:40:26 GMT -5
Why are so many men worried that women will change on them and so many women don't seem to have that same corresponding fear? Like their fears seem to be other things. Why is that? Socialization? Women do have this fear...she may not tell you that but trust it's probably there. |
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Post by DamieQue™ on May 15, 2009 11:40:27 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
Damie--(and everybody)--how do you feel about the prospect of remaining perpetually single? How does this make you feel? Frightened? Excited? Happy? Sad? Would you be willing? Would you feel you were missing out?
Of course I do have a theory that humans aren't designed to be alone... that they are actually designed with the need to interact with others.
That all said, I'd rather do a life time of alone and happy then together and miserable. |
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Post by No Screen Name on May 15, 2009 11:40:59 GMT -5
As it stands right now, I can see being content with it. Having plenty of free time, not having to answer to anybody about the money, being able to come and go as I please, pursuing my hobbies and interests--and NEVER having to fight over the Big Piece of Chicken. ;D
But that sin-free sex deal seems like a good one, too...
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Post by DamieQue™ on May 15, 2009 11:41:51 GMT -5
Why are so many men worried that women will change on them and so many women don't seem to have that same corresponding fear? Like their fears seem to be other things. Why is that? Socialization? Women do have this fear...she may not tell you that but trust it's probably there. |
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Post by coldfront06 on May 15, 2009 11:45:52 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
Damie--(and everybody)--how do you feel about the prospect of remaining perpetually single? How does this make you feel? Frightened? Excited? Happy? Sad? Content? Would you be willing? Would you feel you were missing out? At one point in time I couldn't even imagine being single forever...I was constantly in a relationship. Then I went years without being in one and I have to say that I was very happy. So the thought of potentially being single forever doesn't bother me as much. |
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Post by Bunny Hop on May 15, 2009 11:52:07 GMT -5
Women do have this fear...she may not tell you that but trust it's probably there. I don't know how many times it's been mentioned in this thread. I just know that it is a fear and it has happened. |
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Post by Prissy New Year!!! on May 15, 2009 11:55:52 GMT -5
Damie--(and everybody)--how do you feel about the prospect of remaining perpetually single? How does this make you feel? Frightened? Excited? Happy? Sad? Would you be willing? Would you feel you were missing out?
Of course I do have a theory that humans aren't designed to be alone... that they are actually designed with the need to interact with others.
That all said, I'd rather do a life time of alone and happy then together and miserable. Damie, you said your parents have a happy marriage. Have you ever asked them about their marriage and how they have maintained it all of these years. I have a theory about you, that I have pieced together from this thread and the personality thread....you sound a lot like my husband. You have very high standards for people so they are guaranteed to disappoint you. For the record, people like you are very hard to live with. I don't think that you should not have any standards, but you have to give people room to be human and to be different from you. This goes for everyone, if you get married, your spouse will end up disappointing you at some point. Sometimes God allows that to happen so we can see what is in our spouse, but a lot of times God allows people to disappoint us so that we can see what is in us. Every failed relationship or dissapointment is not about the other person, even if they were the ones who did wrong...sometimes it is an opportunity for us to examine ourselves. |
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 11:57:19 GMT -5
Yall depress me. Sheesh. I'll be married under 30. Cries....
*grin*
When I gracefully accepted that I could be alone forever and enjoy it...that's when my boo came along. Irony. It always catches up with me.
However, I think I am not afraid of marriage, because of the way I view a successful relationship. I think you can have a successful relationship that ends as long as you got more out of the relationship than was lost.
I agree with Prissy that divorce is the not the end of the world. I don't think anyone goes to the altar WANTING or even EXPECTING a divorce. However, IMO you can't fear one. It seems the very things we fear ---haunt us and eventually come true.
*shrugs* I'll check back with everyone after September. Then again in 5yrs LOL
We'll see if my views stay the same.
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Post by 123Diva on May 15, 2009 11:59:44 GMT -5
This goes for everyone, if you get married, your spouse will end up disappointing you at some point. Sometimes God allows that to happen so we can see what is in our spouse, but a lot of times God allows people to disappoint us so that we can see what is in us. Every failed relationship or dissapointment is not about the other person, even if they were the ones who did wrong...sometimes it is an opportunity for us to examine ourselves.damn Prissy. You are just preaching up in here. That is soooo true. I got another Exalt for you after I exalt Gamma. |
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Post by Bunny Hop on May 15, 2009 12:01:19 GMT -5
Every failed relationship or dissapointment is not about the other person, even if they were the ones who did wrong...sometimes it is an opportunity for us to examine ourselves. ain't that the truth! |
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Post by Prissy New Year!!! on May 15, 2009 12:01:44 GMT -5
This goes for everyone, if you get married, your spouse will end up disappointing you at some point. Sometimes God allows that to happen so we can see what is in our spouse, but a lot of times God allows people to disappoint us so that we can see what is in us. Every failed relationship or dissapointment is not about the other person, even if they were the ones who did wrong...sometimes it is an opportunity for us to examine ourselves.damn Prissy. You are just preaching up in here. That is soooo true. I got another Exalt for you after I exalt Gamma. Thanks! I am going to keep talking about marriage---that is the only time I get exalts. Keep em coming!!  |
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 12:03:44 GMT -5
YES LAWD!!!!!!! Prissy is your husband born in late December or early January? And those people that think there are only two roads. The right road and the wrong road. And OF COURSE their road is the right road. So either you are on that road with them or they are spending half their time trying to convince you to get off the other road and join theirs. So many times I have to explain to my fiance, "baby you know there are several way to get to the final destination?And those ways can all be right" His responses is that there is a shortest route and that's the right route! LOL But not everyone values the same things. Some people want to take the scenic view. Doesn't matter because they will get their eventually. It's such a hard comprehention for those personality types in my opinion that there are many versions of correctness. Other people can see it, do it and experience differently and still be right AS WELL. Damie, you said your parents have a happy marriage. Have you ever asked them about their marriage and how they have maintained it all of these years. I have a theory about you, that I have pieced together from this thread and the personality thread....you sound a lot like my husband. You have very high standards for people so they are guaranteed to disappoint you. For the record, people like you are very hard to live with. I don't think that you should not have any standards, but you have to give people room to be human and to be different from you. This goes for everyone, if you get married, your spouse will end up disappointing you at some point. Sometimes God allows that to happen so we can see what is in our spouse, but a lot of times God allows people to disappoint us so that we can see what is in us. Every failed relationship or dissapointment is not about the other person, even if they were the ones who did wrong...sometimes it is an opportunity for us to examine ourselves. |
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 12:06:00 GMT -5
I think it has made you a wiser person, Cam. I value your honest perspective. I was young, AFRAID yet felt a strong (yet unspoken) bit of obligation. |
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Post by No Screen Name on May 15, 2009 12:10:21 GMT -5
So you're saying it's an astrological thing, Outtie?
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 12:13:46 GMT -5
^^^ROTFL . Um I've just noticed this from people born around these time frames. I am sure others have these traits as well. They have a very strong flip side to the coin as well.  |
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Post by LejaOMG on May 15, 2009 12:41:33 GMT -5
actually, Outtie is trying out her 10% accurate Astrological determination prowess on you. Encourage her. It's all she has.
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 12:43:41 GMT -5
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!! I am just saying. I noticed this from these groups of folks. LOL I didnt say it was their sign pushing it...just that these people show it the most. ;D actually, Outtie is trying out her 10% accurate Astrological determination prowess on you. Encourage her. It's all she has. |
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Bigs
OOA pledge
Posts: 236
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Post by Bigs on May 15, 2009 14:02:30 GMT -5
hmmm I was born in late December.... and I'm just the nicest asshole you'll ever meet.
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Post by No Screen Name on May 15, 2009 14:10:24 GMT -5
What's the flipside?
I have a friend born in January who isn't like this--but she was born in late January, so maybe that's why.
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 14:13:18 GMT -5
Late Jan aquarious...early mid Jan capricorn.
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Post by nsync on May 15, 2009 14:14:11 GMT -5
Oh th flipside. LOL Very dependable, very focused,loyal, kind...
etc...
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Post by THE emPRISS on May 15, 2009 20:56:47 GMT -5
The problem is.....nothing changes except your point of view! If you expect the lights to flash and the thunder to roll and the ground to lift you into the heavens then you are in for an awakening! Marriage is not unlike dating except like Priss said, there is this sense of, "damn....I can't leave" I'll agree that both relationships (marriage and dating) have their similarities, but I don't agree with having the sense of I can't leave. It seems more people now have the feeling that marriage is as easy to leave as a regular relationship. All you need is some money and agreement that it's over. I will say marriage has left me with a sense of "I never want to leave". I agree. |
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Post by THE emPRISS on May 15, 2009 20:57:57 GMT -5
SEE? More discouraging advice from a subject matter expert. THAT's why folks are fearful. Well I'll throw my hat in as a positive. I've been married for almost 5 yrs and although it has been hard work, it has been the most worthwhile job I've ever had . I'm an individualistic person, but when I see a situation that is worth it, I'm willing to put aside my personal desires for a common goal. I got married at 24 because I was sure that my wife was the one I wanted to be with for the rest of my life. I knew we had different ideas on different things, but the way I felt about her assured me that I was willing to be faithful and meet on some type of common ground when needed. Now at 5 years, I can honestly say that I am still as happy to be married as the day I said I do. There have been struggles as there always will be with two strong minded individuals, but I never forget how I feel about her and the reason for my decision. Thats beautiful |
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Post by THE emPRISS on May 15, 2009 21:00:10 GMT -5
Naw dude... that's one of my fears. That I meet a lady, she seems on the up-and-up. Everything is all good (meaning you laugh, you love, you fight, you make up - but you feel like you know this person). Then you get married and you meet this person who has been hiding behind the Public Relations Director for the last 2 years who is unleashed on your a$$ now that you can't escape
The best way to sum it up is in the words of Magneto as he ran away from the Mutant C0mpound as Phoenix disintegrated the whole facility:
"My God What Have I Done"?
I sh*t you not....I have a friend, a Bruh, who this happened to. He said that after he got married he learned that his wife was basically living a lie...they are divorced. The story is wild too...smh. She basically lied about everything. |
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