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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 7:17:43 GMT -5
OMG, I just found out that my nephew's mother has been taking him with her to spend the night with her boyfriend. I AM SO FRIGGING PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!You wanna go spend the night with your man so you take a 6 YO with you and park him in a guest bedroom?  ? Am I overreacting? Is this how single moms are getting down these day? ? |
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 7:42:45 GMT -5
Kids under 8 go to sleep early and he isn't in the same room as the adults.
I probably would be the same situation if the guy came over to her house. Kid in one room adults in another.
I don't see a problem. You are overreacting
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Post by Rare_Commodity on Jun 1, 2011 9:03:24 GMT -5
I don't have children but I have mixed feelings about this. I rather see him with her at the bf house then her leaving him at home alone. IJS...
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 9:42:21 GMT -5
what would you have her do? #seriousquestion
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 10:27:19 GMT -5
what would you have her do? #seriousquestion Limit her overnight visits to times when her son is with his father or other reliable care provider. |
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 1, 2011 10:32:05 GMT -5
I don't know, you guys. I'm kinda with 91 on this one
I wouldn't take my child with me so go spend the night with a guy. My overnighters would have to be limited to when my child is not my care. It just doesn't feel right to me.
*PS: 91 it took a lot out of me to agree with you. I shall take to my bed now with asprin and a cool compress. *
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 10:37:26 GMT -5
LOL. I'm surprised you have such an OLD school view!
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 10:39:54 GMT -5
I don't have children but I have mixed feelings about this. I rather see him with her at the bf house then her leaving him at home alone. IJS... I would whoop that trick's a$$ across 6 states if she left him at home.............. |
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 1, 2011 10:40:57 GMT -5
what can I say? I'm a bit old fashioned.  |
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 10:47:32 GMT -5
M'eh. I understand why you're pissed. And I'm thankful that as a child, I was never presented with any situations like this, but I think it's probably not the end of the world. If old boy were coming over to spend the night, I think it would seem much more normal (although substantially the same concerns exist).
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Post by ReignMan19 on Jun 1, 2011 10:49:06 GMT -5
Momma got needs.
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Post by Rare_Commodity on Jun 1, 2011 10:49:41 GMT -5
True. It also depends on how long she's been dating this man. The only reason I say OK is because I hope she has known him for an extended time but if she just met 'old dude nawww that ain't gone fly.
That brings about another question at what point do you introduce your kids to your new boo?
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 1, 2011 10:51:34 GMT -5
Momma needs to find a babysitter.
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 11:12:35 GMT -5
Momma needs to find a babysitter. Do you know how expensive an all night babysitter is? |
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 11:16:45 GMT -5
She isn't sexing Dude in front of the kid.
She is making sure her kid is ok, before she gets hers.
Sounds responsible to me.
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 11:17:53 GMT -5
Also if this is happening at night then it is not like the kid is being babysat by a barney video. The kid is asleep 6yo sleep usually 8-12 hrs
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 1, 2011 11:23:18 GMT -5
Momma needs to find a babysitter. Do you know how expensive an all night babysitter is? Family is free |
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 11:39:00 GMT -5
Do you know how expensive an all night babysitter is? Family is free Not for everyone. You don't know this chick's family or if she has one she may be an orphan |
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 11:59:23 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm just thinking that is isn't that bad. A 6-year old shouldn't even fully understand the nature of their relationship. She should just be careful that her behavior isn't contradicting anything her child is learning about the appropriateness of male/female relationships (i.e. I don't understand why my lil homegirl isn't allowed have boys play in her room, but Mommy sleeps all night with Mr. so-and-so in his room) , but other than that...there are a LOT worse things.
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 12:01:20 GMT -5
Also, I've realized over the past year or so, that if you're not prepared to be an alternate, you have to live with the parent's choices. My neice is being raised by an unfit dumbazz (who, unfortunately, is her mother). I can't take her, so I'm not in a position to be vocal about the things I don't approve of.
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 12:01:24 GMT -5
Queen, you're entitled to your opinion but doesn't having a child mean putting their needs first and setting some kind of example? I will never cosign that it's OK to take your kid on booty calls just because he's in a different room. Reach out and touch ya self to get you over the hump.
@ Rare, I can't even get into your question. That is a seriously sore spot for me. My nephew must have met at least 20 women over the last few years courtesy of my brother's lack of discretion and I can count at least 8 "uncle so and so's" courtesy of the mom. Effing UGH.
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 12:02:42 GMT -5
Queen, you're entitled to your opinion but doesn't having a child mean putting their needs first and setting some kind of example? I will never cosign that it's OK to take your kid on booty calls just because he's in a different room. Reach out and touch ya self to get you over the hump. @ Rare, I can't even get into your question. That is a seriously sore spot for me. My nephew must have met at least 20 women over the last few years courtesy of my brother's lack of discretion and I can count at least 8 "uncle so and so's" courtesy of the mom. Effing UGH. ok, ok...this is a booty call? NOT a long-term/serious boyfriend? If so, I think that would change my perspective. |
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 12:04:05 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm just thinking that is isn't that bad. A 6-year old shouldn't even fully understand the nature of their relationship. She should just be careful that her behavior isn't contradicting anything her child is learning about the appropriateness of male/female relationships (i.e. I don't understand why my lil homegirl isn't allowed have boys play in her room, but Mommy sleeps all night with Mr. so-and-so in his room) , but other than that...there are a LOT worse things. There are plenty of worse things but this is my rant for the day. Just go with it.....LOL |
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Post by T-Rex91 on Jun 1, 2011 12:11:00 GMT -5
Queen, you're entitled to your opinion but doesn't having a child mean putting their needs first and setting some kind of example? I will never cosign that it's OK to take your kid on booty calls just because he's in a different room. Reach out and touch ya self to get you over the hump. @ Rare, I can't even get into your question. That is a seriously sore spot for me. My nephew must have met at least 20 women over the last few years courtesy of my brother's lack of discretion and I can count at least 8 "uncle so and so's" courtesy of the mom. Effing UGH. ok, ok...this is a booty call? NOT a long-term/serious boyfriend? If so, I think that would change my perspective. OK, let's put some context on this. He is not some dude she picked up casually and lately. I've been hearing his name for about 6 months. But if he's with his Dad every other weekend, it just doesn't seem unreasonable to me that you could spend those weekends with the dude. Hell, I live near dude; drop nephew at my house! |
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Post by QueenOH on Jun 1, 2011 12:11:59 GMT -5
you didn't say it was a booty call at first
That is a horse of a different color
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 13:57:00 GMT -5
am I wrong that I don't believe for a second that you would be willing to babysit for old girl just because she has an itch that needs scratching?
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Post by Julie Art on Jun 1, 2011 14:17:01 GMT -5
I'm with '91 on this one. If dad gets child every other weekend, that's when you get your groove on. I believe in being the example you want your child to follow and I wouldn't think it's appropriate to have them see me sleeping in the same bed with someone I'm not married to, but that's just me. I mean, I don't believe in shacking either. I may stay with him a couple nights and vice versa, but he has a place in his name and me in mine.
Hardware before houseware
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 14:26:59 GMT -5
yeah, if she doesn't wish to convey to her son that premarital sex is bad (and if not, I fully understand...many adults do not feel that way--to each his own), then I don't see it being a huge problem. Some parents won't drink in front of their kids because they find it in poor taste. Me? I fully intend to. Why? I don't have a problem with responsible drinking by adults and will not teach my kids that anything is wrong with alcohol. My actions will match my instructions.
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 1, 2011 15:01:21 GMT -5
the added details only serve to make my feelings on this matter stronger. That kid comes first. Taking him to some dudes house because you are horny is a major no in my opinion. If you can't find a babysitter, then find another way to work that out.
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 1, 2011 15:26:34 GMT -5
the added details only serve to make my feelings on this matter stronger. That kid comes first. Taking him to some dudes house because you are horny is a major no in my opinion. If you can't find a babysitter, then find another way to work that out. because you are horny? I'm trying to figure out why we're presuming that sex is her prevailing motivation. What about because you are in love and considering a future with the person and want your child to get used to being in his home? |
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