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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 3, 2011 16:27:58 GMT -5
also I just remembered that when I sat down, I put down my drink in order to hug Reign and ol' crybaby dude asked "oh, what're u drinking?" and I answered politely, "Bourbon." He was the FIRST one to get smart hollerin about "oh, I could've figured that. Bourbon and what? I mean, it could be ginger ale, it could be coke." I looked him straight in the eye and said: It's bourbon. [dramatic pause] With ice. He wasn't really beat for me after that. Door #3-- Someone asked Reign and I the inevitable "so how'd u two meet?" question. Reign says effortlessly "oh, we know each other through mutual friends." I was so impressed I blurted out "mutual friends?! I like that! good one! Hi-five!" and everyone just shifted around uneasily for a few minutes. My bad. Actually you said "Mutual friends? eh, I'ma have to use that one." A W K W A R D S I L E N C E... I hated you for that... |
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Post by Alc 06 on Jun 3, 2011 17:02:33 GMT -5
I respectfully request that either Reign or Alc tell last weekend's Chicken & Waffles story. Leave nothing out. #leh'go...... Background: Gladys and Ron's Chicken and Waffles opened a new location in Union City GA...strike 1 (Pun intended and you'll see why). Of all places to put said "restaurant", they place it in a bowling alley that has just reopened...strike 2 (that's where the pun comes in. See what I did there?). Story: So, Leja, Reign and I decide to meet up there for breakfast, as served by the neck-tattoo wearing locals. We assumed that this would be a full-service Gladys and Ron's, but oh were we wrong. It's a Gladys and Ron's Bistro, not restaurant. The server brings us our drinks, and they were in paper cups (not even plastic gas station cups, but paper cups, like oversized Dixie cups. We order our food, and were surprised at how fast the food came out. We were also surprised at how un-porcelain the plates were. Plastic to-go plates to be exact. And the kicker: remember, to-go plates, paper cups, and they had the nerve to give us REAL SILVERWARE wrapped in cloth napkins!!! Oh and the syrup. The syrup came in McDonald's-style, Aunt Jemima syrup packs, like the ones you dip French Toast sticks in. And this mofo, who Reign strongly asserted belonged in the 11th grade, had the nerve to bring one for each person, like those sponges they call waffles weren't gonna absorb that syrup in 2 seconds. I mean, dude looked like he belonged in remedial pre-simplified general math. Anyway, so, he brings us more packets of syrup (i'm surprised he didn't charge us 25 cents per), and I ask for salt and pepper, which I noticed weren't on any of the tables. This is the point I should have known it would go downhill. This dude brings me the silverware-in-the-pack that you get with church dinners, with the salt and pepper packets inside. Not nary salt shaker (no Ying Yang Twinz) anywhere to be found. So, Leja decides to entertain the situation (and these are not exact quotes) L: So, I'm just curious as to why you don't have salt and pepper shakers. Server: well, since it's a bowling alley, we expect most people to take their food back to their lanes (kinda understandable), so we package everything to-go. (But negro you have tables AND real silverware, cloth napkins, etc). L: Well, what about the people who decide to dine in over here (and look at those nice flat-screens they had all over the place). S: We will be getting some new salt and pepper in. L: Oh, so you'll be getting shakers? S: (with an uncomfortable look) not exactly. They will be bigger packets (probably like the syrup). What I can't understand is why it even makes sense to have someone waste plastic cutlery just to have access to salt. Especially when you have a Walmart around the corner. Just one big gigantic, epic fail on so many levels not quite equal to Chal's family's wedding. |
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Post by Chal™ on Jun 3, 2011 18:51:39 GMT -5
LMBO @ see what I did there LMBO @ the dixie cups LMBO @ Leja picking on the server  @ the CFW reference I needed the laugh today. Thanks, you guys |
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Post by Southie on Jun 4, 2011 7:21:16 GMT -5
Well this was entertaining
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Post by Julie Art on Jun 5, 2011 0:11:15 GMT -5
Very.
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Post by ShimmeringSTAR on Jun 5, 2011 14:20:04 GMT -5
Lmboooo
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Post by ReignMan19 on Jun 6, 2011 8:50:05 GMT -5
I will unlock Door #7 I was working in South Florida one weekend and had to work in Dallas the following weekend, so I thought I'd spend the meantime and between time travelling through Florida and Georgia erstwhile visiting my folks in those areas (incl. Reign, Kryptik, Alc, Quiet 'nem). First stop: North Florida at Casa de Reign. I showed up at the crib with an afro puff, a sundress and flat sandals (I try to wear flats when I'm hanging with Reign). Besides my encountering a displaced African and his random caged mammal squatting in his living room, things started off fairly normal. We went to dinner and saw a man wearing denim shorts on a date. Apparently this sort of thing sets Reign clean off. He fussed for several minutes about how "this is NOT South Beach" and "that ninja need to put on some damn pants. Thereafter, I believe he proceeded to tweet about it (I didn't have a smartphone then). After dinner when I am in the beginning stages of a food coma, Reign announces that we will be going to a club (he's doing the announcing, I'm doing the driving). My thought: whoa! I'm not even wearing shoes! No makeup, my hair's not club-ready, this is going to be a disaster. I ain't wanna be no punk tho, so I was like "cool." We arrive to the club, I order a drink and these bamas are serving bourbon out of the beverage gun. What?! But I ain't wanna have a liquor snob diva moment so I drank it and saddown. We're watching the empty dancefloor like spectators when suddenly a bunch teenyboppers hit the floor and began performing a line dance that they obviously invented in somebody's basement. This...is the sole form of entertainment for at least 20 minutes. I went to the bathroom, came back and the club attendance tripled by the time I came out. Ok, time to hit the dancefloor. As you may know, I wear at least 3 inch heels every day of my life. I find it hard to maintain my balance with out some elevation. So I kept trying to dance without moving my feet (so as not to fall over) and that, of course, didn't work. I felt retarded. Next thing you know, the DJ yells out "EVERYBODY FACE THE MUTHAEFFIN WALL! NOW! THE WALL!" and I was shook to high heaven, cause I thought something was about to pop off. I'm thinkin "oh lawd, if I get locked up out-of-state, I ain't finna get released til Tuesday." Then the beat drops. Man I got that swaaaaaaaag. My hat matchin my baaaaaaag.... Ohhhh!! No one's getting locked up at all. We're about to do a synchronized hip-hop dance. Ok. I can handle this. Then I realized, sh&#^! I don't know how to do this crap! So I'm once again looking like rhythmless nation trying to swag and/or surf with no balance whatsoever. I didn't bust my azz, but I did succeed in thoroughly embarassing Reign. After the song, he was like "ok, L. Let's go sit down" all downtrodden-like. Then it happened. Some Florida adaptation of Philly-inspired wu-tang music. (you'll have to Youtube it) It requires no foot movement at all. Just the wildest arms possible with the occasional hips. I was saved! I don't remember anything about the song, but the chorus was: STICK! STICK! STICK! STICK! HA! Your memory is great. I totally forgot about the dude who was wearing his picnic short set on a date. SMH... And for the record. The club we went to is sort of a staple in town. I dont really frequent the spot but most out of towners want to at least experience it so I thought I'd take L. And yes L was definitely rhythm less nation. lol.. but she made up for it Memorial Weekend tho  |
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Post by ReignMan19 on Jun 6, 2011 8:52:19 GMT -5
I'm still stuck on the fact we have real silverware and linen napkins but everything else was "to go" materials... lol I"M REALLY confused at how you properly coordinate a greasy chicken and waffle joint with a bowling alley... it just seems like ingredients for disaster... I respectfully request that either Reign or Alc tell last weekend's Chicken & Waffles story. Leave nothing out. #leh'go...... Background: Gladys and Ron's Chicken and Waffles opened a new location in Union City GA...strike 1 (Pun intended and you'll see why). Of all places to put said "restaurant", they place it in a bowling alley that has just reopened...strike 2 (that's where the pun comes in. See what I did there?). Story: So, Leja, Reign and I decide to meet up there for breakfast, as served by the neck-tattoo wearing locals. We assumed that this would be a full-service Gladys and Ron's, but oh were we wrong. It's a Gladys and Ron's Bistro, not restaurant. The server brings us our drinks, and they were in paper cups (not even plastic gas station cups, but paper cups, like oversized Dixie cups. We order our food, and were surprised at how fast the food came out. We were also surprised at how un-porcelain the plates were. Plastic to-go plates to be exact. And the kicker: remember, to-go plates, paper cups, and they had the nerve to give us REAL SILVERWARE wrapped in cloth napkins!!! Oh and the syrup. The syrup came in McDonald's-style, Aunt Jemima syrup packs, like the ones you dip French Toast sticks in. And this mofo, who Reign strongly asserted belonged in the 11th grade, had the nerve to bring one for each person, like those sponges they call waffles weren't gonna absorb that syrup in 2 seconds. I mean, dude looked like he belonged in remedial pre-simplified general math. Anyway, so, he brings us more packets of syrup (i'm surprised he didn't charge us 25 cents per), and I ask for salt and pepper, which I noticed weren't on any of the tables. This is the point I should have known it would go downhill. This dude brings me the silverware-in-the-pack that you get with church dinners, with the salt and pepper packets inside. Not nary salt shaker (no Ying Yang Twinz) anywhere to be found. So, Leja decides to entertain the situation (and these are not exact quotes) L: So, I'm just curious as to why you don't have salt and pepper shakers. Server: well, since it's a bowling alley, we expect most people to take their food back to their lanes (kinda understandable), so we package everything to-go. (But negro you have tables AND real silverware, cloth napkins, etc). L: Well, what about the people who decide to dine in over here (and look at those nice flat-screens they had all over the place). S: We will be getting some new salt and pepper in. L: Oh, so you'll be getting shakers? S: (with an uncomfortable look) not exactly. They will be bigger packets (probably like the syrup). What I can't understand is why it even makes sense to have someone waste plastic cutlery just to have access to salt. Especially when you have a Walmart around the corner. Just one big gigantic, epic fail on so many levels not quite equal to Chal's family's wedding. |
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Post by LejaOMG on Jun 6, 2011 8:53:04 GMT -5
^^ ya'll shoulda SEEN the shoes I wore last weekend, lol.
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Post by ReignMan19 on Sept 12, 2011 10:58:48 GMT -5
Quiet's Rooftop Bday Shenanigans
This happened last year but just popped in my head for some reason.
Last summer Quiet had her bday shindig at this swanky rooftop joint in Atlanta. Alc and I were there with a few other friends of Quiet. Everyone was conversing getting to know eachother and the drinks started flowing, so like normal black folk everyone started talking real loud and then ignorance began to ensue. I can't articulate all the details but it had to do white girl love, an out of order Leprechaun story, and a canopy full of silver shoe wearing ATL "fun boys" that sat across from of us. We had a really good night. In fact it was so fun this one chick lefted to go on a date and actually came back after it was over. (yes we were there that long)
Not sure if it belongs it in but that was just a random good time with a few OOAers.
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Post by Chal™ on Sept 12, 2011 11:33:47 GMT -5
awwww. lol
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Post by ReignMan19 on Sept 12, 2011 13:28:06 GMT -5
lol..sappy....
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Post by ReignMan19 on Sept 12, 2011 13:30:44 GMT -5
I will say this.. everyone I have met for OOA has been normal... I have yet to run into some "internet weirdo".. most people are similar to their OOA persona except a more calm version... well except Queen, she is actually nice! (she is probably going to come after me for saying that)
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Post by Chal™ on Sept 12, 2011 13:33:51 GMT -5
<--- the internet weirdo   |
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Post by QueenOH on Sept 12, 2011 14:46:30 GMT -5
I've told yall i'm only 68% real on here.
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Post by ReignMan19 on Sept 12, 2011 14:49:12 GMT -5
Yeah.. cause e- Queen doesn't know how to twerk it like IRL Queen ..lol
*durty wine*
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Post by Chal™ on Sept 12, 2011 16:29:56 GMT -5
LOL!!!
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Post by QUIET As Kept on Sept 12, 2011 17:04:31 GMT -5
That was pretty awesome! But how could you forget: *meeting the Tweetmaster general *the entire post-date lesson about men *drunk 25-20s introducing me to world of lingerie from Target (including a show & tell portion)  ...and of course...possibly the funniest ish of the night.... *the post-party snack shenanigans Quiet's Rooftop Bday Shenanigans This happened last year but just popped in my head for some reason. Last summer Quiet had her bday shindig at this swanky rooftop joint in Atlanta. Alc and I were there with a few other friends of Quiet. Everyone was conversing getting to know eachother and the drinks started flowing, so like normal black folk everyone started talking real loud and then ignorance began to ensue. I can't articulate all the details but it had to do white girl love, an out of order Leprechaun story, and a canopy full of silver shoe wearing ATL "fun boys" that sat across from of us. We had a really good night. In fact it was so fun this one chick lefted to go on a date and actually came back after it was over. (yes we were there that long) Not sure if it belongs it in but that was just a random good time with a few OOAers. |
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Post by ReignMan19 on Sept 13, 2011 9:29:17 GMT -5
HAAAA!!! your memory is way better than mine... I totally forgot about the lingere situation.. lol Yes that was a good night. Oh that after dinner snack was the EPICEST tragedy ever. LOL.. you just had to be there. That was pretty awesome! But how could you forget: *meeting the Tweetmaster general *the entire post-date lesson about men *drunk 25-20s introducing me to world of lingerie from Target (including a show & tell portion) ...and of course...possibly the funniest ish of the night.... *the post-party snack shenanigans Quiet's Rooftop Bday Shenanigans This happened last year but just popped in my head for some reason. Last summer Quiet had her bday shindig at this swanky rooftop joint in Atlanta. Alc and I were there with a few other friends of Quiet. Everyone was conversing getting to know eachother and the drinks started flowing, so like normal black folk everyone started talking real loud and then ignorance began to ensue. I can't articulate all the details but it had to do white girl love, an out of order Leprechaun story, and a canopy full of silver shoe wearing ATL "fun boys" that sat across from of us. We had a really good night. In fact it was so fun this one chick lefted to go on a date and actually came back after it was over. (yes we were there that long) Not sure if it belongs it in but that was just a random good time with a few OOAers. |
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Post by Chal™ on Sept 13, 2011 9:39:28 GMT -5
did he really say EPICEST?
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Door #3--
@ the CFW reference
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