Post by BrnSuga on Jun 25, 2008 10:47:03 GMT -5
Juanita Bynum’s Emergency Prayer Kits Cause Strange Fire On HSN Set
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hermansmith.wordpress.com/200...re-on-hsn-set/
Juanita Bynum’s Emergency Prayer Kits Cause Strange Fire On HSN Set
April 8, 2008
by C. KingHisglory
Prophetess Juanita Bynum, a popular TBN regular, was a featured seller on the Home Shopping Network Saturday. Dressed in a stunning long white gown, Ms. Bynum was captivating to watch as she peddled her $500 emergency prayer kit, complete with a Hebrew prayer shawl, a small vial of anointing oil, and gospel teaching tapes. Amazingly, in the first hour the profiteer sold more than 3,500 kits, with the charmed ease of a seasoned and shrewd used car saleswoman.
But as she began the second hour, repeatedly using the spiel “This powerful intercessory package has become mandated by God to become a primary weapon in your personal prayer arsenal! Your emergency kit contains everything you need to discover true power in prayer! ‘Buy one, or even two, now today!’ thus saith the Lord,” suddenly a stack of nearby prayer kits caught fire. Within seconds, the entire set was consumed by flames. Luckily, everyone survived the accident, although the prayer kits were all destroyed.
The cause of the fire is still unknown; fire chief Sam Storner had this to say just yesterday: “We’ve ruled out arson, faulty wiring, cigarettes, spontaneous combustion, gas, grease, etc. as triggers of this blaze, and right now we’re stumped.”
Marcus Jillian, a private investigator for Allexium Insurance, which handles HSN, thinks he has the answer: “The oil in the prayer kits fueled the strange fire, but I’m still searching for the cause of the spark.”
Renowned charismatic prophet Clem Kiment thinks God’s anger was the spark: “Our Lord has had enough of today’s superapostles merchandising the Holy Spirit. The only emergency prayer kit a believer actually needs is the Holy Ghost Himself, and He’s simply not for sale!” he wrote today on his website “The Sound of Free Freedom.”
The prophetess, however, remained undeterred by the accident. “I’m coming back next week with 10,000 more prayer kits, plus my new $5,000 Juanita Bynum fountain pens. All truly prosperous King’s kids should own and be using one or more these classy pens to write with; Bics are for those ignorants still living under the curse of poverty.”
HSN had no comment about the blaze other than “The strange fire has brought Ms. Bynum so much extra publicity that next week she’ll surely become our most profitic vendor.”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
hermansmith.wordpress.com/200...re-on-hsn-set/
Juanita Bynum’s Emergency Prayer Kits Cause Strange Fire On HSN Set
April 8, 2008
by C. KingHisglory
Prophetess Juanita Bynum, a popular TBN regular, was a featured seller on the Home Shopping Network Saturday. Dressed in a stunning long white gown, Ms. Bynum was captivating to watch as she peddled her $500 emergency prayer kit, complete with a Hebrew prayer shawl, a small vial of anointing oil, and gospel teaching tapes. Amazingly, in the first hour the profiteer sold more than 3,500 kits, with the charmed ease of a seasoned and shrewd used car saleswoman.
But as she began the second hour, repeatedly using the spiel “This powerful intercessory package has become mandated by God to become a primary weapon in your personal prayer arsenal! Your emergency kit contains everything you need to discover true power in prayer! ‘Buy one, or even two, now today!’ thus saith the Lord,” suddenly a stack of nearby prayer kits caught fire. Within seconds, the entire set was consumed by flames. Luckily, everyone survived the accident, although the prayer kits were all destroyed.
The cause of the fire is still unknown; fire chief Sam Storner had this to say just yesterday: “We’ve ruled out arson, faulty wiring, cigarettes, spontaneous combustion, gas, grease, etc. as triggers of this blaze, and right now we’re stumped.”
Marcus Jillian, a private investigator for Allexium Insurance, which handles HSN, thinks he has the answer: “The oil in the prayer kits fueled the strange fire, but I’m still searching for the cause of the spark.”
Renowned charismatic prophet Clem Kiment thinks God’s anger was the spark: “Our Lord has had enough of today’s superapostles merchandising the Holy Spirit. The only emergency prayer kit a believer actually needs is the Holy Ghost Himself, and He’s simply not for sale!” he wrote today on his website “The Sound of Free Freedom.”
The prophetess, however, remained undeterred by the accident. “I’m coming back next week with 10,000 more prayer kits, plus my new $5,000 Juanita Bynum fountain pens. All truly prosperous King’s kids should own and be using one or more these classy pens to write with; Bics are for those ignorants still living under the curse of poverty.”
HSN had no comment about the blaze other than “The strange fire has brought Ms. Bynum so much extra publicity that next week she’ll surely become our most profitic vendor.”
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