If a Soror/Bruh was Antagonizing Your Child...

[Oren Ishii]

...What would you do?

I was talking w/a Greek friend & this came up.

If your child went to school & was pretty well behaved (doc'd by teachers), did fairly well in class, and participated in school activities, but a member of your org in Administration disliked them for some reason, how would you approach them about it?

If that dislike escalated to them affecting the school experience (blocking your child's participation in preferential programs & activities), would you be more inclined to act?

For those wondering about what this has to do with Greekdom:

I wasn't saying that the problem was Greek related, just how would you approach a member of your org if they were bothering your child. Would their membership matter? Would the fact that you took the same oath keep you from straight up snapping? Would you be more diplomatic b/c of it?

The incident has nothing to do with the fact you're both XYZ.

[Blu]

I think the whole Greek affiliation thing goes out the window when your child is concerned. If someone was treating my child unfairly, we would have a problem.

[T-Rex91]

EXACTLY what Blu said.

[Julie Art]

WHAT Blue said. Blood thicker then water, nobody is mistreating my child, I don't care if you President Obama!

[Oren Ishii]

But how would you handle it?

Would you simply call & speak with the Admin, set up an appt, and not acknowledge org affiliation?

Would you acknowledge it, then set it aside & handle business? What?

[Blu]

I'd probably set up an appointment to speak with the Admin. I would not mention the affiliation until after he pissed me off and the conversation became heated..lol I'd hope to appeal to the person's human decency. I know it's a slim chance, but that would be my first instinct.. I have a feeling if he's already an ass, our Greek Connection won't probably change that..

[T-Rex91]

Let's put it this way, the affiliation would have no bearing. I'd set up an appointment at the earliest time available and show up for a meeting. I wouldn't even acknowledge it. This is NOT a "lean on the shield" moment.

[DamieQue™]

Muse...

Does this other person know you share the same affiliation? It seems to me (for example) that if they are an AKA and know you are an AKA, nothing from a fraternal perspective was keeping them from antagonizing your child.

In either event, my kids are my priority. Messing with them is a declaration of war, I don't care if you're with the freaking Illuminati.

[Oren Ishii]

Interesting answers. I've heard everything from

"I'mma question their affiliation first. Charge that fool up cause he MUST not be frat messing with my child."

to

"I'mma go off, then mention affiliation later."

In this case (this is a real incident), it is an adult child in college. The Admin. started the whole issue by making neg. comments about the child's participation in a multi-cultural activity. The comment was made that the performance was basically too "Black," (they were rapping in a talent show, BTW) & embarrassing in front of clear folks.

A fellow Admin asked the child about the incident & went back & told what was said. The child was approached by the Admin in question & asked if he "was talking about the Admin behind her back" & warned that "he better be glad she was nice..."

It's been drama every since. She is blocking him from getting into a very impt program now b/c she is over it. He aced the interview, & found out from the interviewers later that she told them that he WOULD NOT get in. Period.

[Oren Ishii]

I don't have a son @ Damie.

But no, the Admin doesn't know the mom is in her org.

Apr 16, 2010 14:00:42 GMT -5 DamieQue™ said:

Muse...

Does this other person know you share the same affiliation? It seems to me (for example) that if they are an AKA and know you are an AKA, nothing from a fraternal perspective was keeping them from antagonizing your child.

In either event, my kids are my priority. Messing with them is a declaration of war, I don't care if you're with the freaking Illuminati.

[T-Rex91]

This is not a Greek issue so I don't know why it would come up. Even if an AKA was hazing my child, it still wouldn't be a Greek issue. I guess I just don't see where affiliations come in.

[DamieQue™]

Apr 16, 2010 14:05:24 GMT -5 Oren Ishii said:

Interesting answers. I've heard everything from

"I'mma question their affiliation first. Charge that fool up cause he MUST not be frat messing with my child."

to

"I'mma go off, then mention affiliation later."

In this case (this is a real incident), it is an adult child in college. The Admin. started the whole issue by making neg. comments about the child's participation in a multi-cultural activity. The comment was made that the performance was basically too "Black," (they were rapping in a talent show, BTW) & embarrassing in front of clear folks.

A fellow Admin asked the child about the incident & went back & told what was said. The child was approached & asked if he "was talking about the Admin behind her back" & warned that "he better be glad she was nice..."

It's been drama every since. She is blocking him from getting into a very impt program now b/c she is over it. He aced the interview, & found out from the interviewers later that she told them that he WOULD NOT get in. Period.

When I read this account, honestly Greek affiliation is irrelevant. The issue is the issue... everything else is just periphery

[Coldfront06]

Greek affiliation means nothing to me in a circumstance like this. I'd treat the person like I would any other person messing with my child...I wouldn't even mention affiliation.

[Oren Ishii]

When my friend asked me about it, I told her that I thought that org. aff. might only help in building rapport & getting the Admin to open up enough to find out what her real issue is.

At this point, I really have no idea if the parent getting involved at all will help her son get what he needs. The only thing I could see is if she went to this person's immed. superior with evidence of the issues & try to get the whole thing addressed that way.

I think it's stupid for grown folks to treat college kids like this b/c they don't behave the way they want. What the hell?

As far as Greekdom goes, there are petty people in every org, I guess.

[icebraka]

Apr 16, 2010 13:40:57 GMT -5 Blu said:

I think the whole Greek affiliation thing goes out the window when your child is concerned. If someone was treating my child unfairly, we would have a problem.

ok! Soror or not I'd mess her up on contact.

[Bathroom Model]

when we start hazing kids?

[icebraka]

Apr 16, 2010 14:05:24 GMT -5 Oren Ishii said:

Interesting answers. I've heard everything from

"I'mma question their affiliation first. Charge that fool up cause he MUST not be frat messing with my child."

to

"I'mma go off, then mention affiliation later."

In this case (this is a real incident), it is an adult child in college. The Admin. started the whole issue by making neg. comments about the child's participation in a multi-cultural activity. The comment was made that the performance was basically too "Black," (they were rapping in a talent show, BTW) & embarrassing in front of clear folks.

A fellow Admin asked the child about the incident & went back & told what was said. The child was approached & asked if he "was talking about the Admin behind her back" & warned that "he better be glad she was nice..."

It's been drama every since. She is blocking him from getting into a very impt program now b/c she is over it. He aced the interview, & found out from the interviewers later that she told them that he WOULD NOT get in. Period.

So what does greekdom have to do with this?


I can almost agree with asking the person about the comments being said in his performance because I work on a college campus, a saltine campus at that and some of the n word acts make me cringe at times.

[Troopa1911]

Apr 16, 2010 13:40:57 GMT -5 Blu said:

I think the whole Greek affiliation thing goes out the window when your child is concerned. If someone was treating my child unfairly, we would have a problem.

well said, but let me say this. I will be on Ready..Set ..Go to beat his a$$ messin' wit my kid. Bruh or no Bruh. My seed komes first!

He better have one hayle of an excuse to be mistreating my child!

The Shield would take a seat on the back of the school bus!

[Oren Ishii]

@braka:

I saw the video, and from what I saw they had on baggy pants (of course), & were jumping across the stage. The rap was about the school & the student body. There were some girls dancing - nothing raunchy.

Excessive profanity or anything like that could get you disqual'd.

LMAO @ saltine school

[BKupInHere]

I bet if the parent mentions to the Admin that they are in the same org the Admin would accuse the PARENT of "leaning on the shield". Then the Admin would "crow" about to Admin ANDmembers of the org. The Admin sounds like she hasnt had any since it last had her. @ Muse: your friend needs to go NUCLEAR on this heifer!

[peppermint]

In general, I don't think affiliation would matter. If it did, I would be concerned in some ways.

In this particular situation... not too sure I would get directly involved as the parent. I would make sure that my child has done everything within his power before I intervened. At some point he has to start acting like a big boy and solve his own problems.

[Oren Ishii]

Added the content of this post to the 1st one in the thread.

[All Pledging Is Legal]

I would pull out some wood and put that fool in the cut.

[thatque]

Well I don't have any kids, but if i did I would address my child first to make sure things was done decent & in order & then instruct & empower my child to address this situation with plenty of tact & respect. Then if there was no resolution, then I as the parent would do my due dilligence research the program & look into the incident before addressing the issue then I would bring it to the attention of the school first & have them serve a a mediator when I do come talk to this administrator because I will need to know what happened, why it happened, & how can it be rectified/resolved & once I have all that done then if necessary I would address the administrator one on one in private prior to bringing up "OUR" affilation because I would again check in see if this person is the type that just joined to join or are they truly living the Fraternity! So this is when I will let them know (If necessary) that we are in the same fraternity & I would let them know what my expectations are (No favoritism) if they act up then put your foot in thier A$$ but if not then I need them to push & promote my child like they was thier own child by encouraging them to do thier absolute best at all times!

[Bunny Hop]

Who the hell cares if someone is your frat or soror when they're treating your kid like crap?

[123Diva]

Apr 18, 2010 16:36:21 GMT -5 Bunny Hop said:

Who the hell cares if someone is your frat or soror when they're treating your kid like crap?

Super Greeks.

[Chal™]

i was gonna ask that same question, Bun. When it comes to your child, wait a minute, let me add a lil emphasis. When it comes to YOUR CHILD, what does Greek affiliation have to do with anything. This is YOUR CHILD. YOUR SEED. YOUR FLESH. YOUR BLOOD. That trumps EVERYTHING.

[FatalDST]

Apr 16, 2010 13:40:57 GMT -5 Blu said:

I think the whole Greek affiliation thing goes out the window when your child is concerned. If someone was treating my child unfairly, we would have a problem.

what him said! this would be her vs her and trying not to whoop her ass for fucking with my kid

[Bunny Hop]

Apr 19, 2010 3:05:17 GMT -5 Chal™ said:

i was gonna ask that same question, Bun. When it comes to your child, wait a minute, let me add a lil emphasis. When it comes to YOUR CHILD, what does Greek affiliation have to do with anything. This is YOUR CHILD. YOUR SEED. YOUR FLESH. YOUR BLOOD. That trumps EVERYTHING.

I know! It think people forget that people in XYZ are still people.

If someone is going into a situation like this thinking "oh well let me not go off on them because they're a soror" then their priorities are totally off.

[Iceman]

Apr 16, 2010 13:40:57 GMT -5 Blu said:

I think the whole Greek affiliation thing goes out the window when your child is concerned. If someone was treating my child unfairly, we would have a problem.

THIS.